No Fuss, No Muss: Baguettes

Lisa: Well, we could do something fun. Um, how about a beach party?
Erin: Oh, great idea, Lis.
Dean: I know where there’s a beach.
Ben: I know where we can get some baguettes!
– Summer of 4 Ft. 2 (The Simpsons Season 7 – Episode 25)


Happy Bastille Day! Except, according to this article you shouldn’t actually mention the Bastille on July 14. In France, this holiday is known as: la Fête Nationale – “Nationale” what the hell is that?! Anyway, it stands to reason that American writers would make a joke for American audiences and thus we have Bastille Day. But I’m not here to give you a lesson on French holidays (except, I kind of just did), we’re here for the baguettes!


I love baguettes because they are so crunchy. However, that crunchiness will not last so you pretty much need to consume an entire baguette the day of purchase; or you will suffer through eating a day-old baguette which has transformed from deliciously crunchy into disappointingly soggy. Does that mean I ate an entire baguette in one evening? Of course not! I went to a beach party and was the person who brought the baguettes.

Everyone knows that the one who brings the baguettes is the most popular person at any party, way more popular than people who bring booze. We spent the night eating baguettes and then I taught everyone all the things I have learned from David Hasselhoff (after I taught them about French holidays, of course). Good times!

Cromulence: 8 Head Buckeroos out of 10

No Fuss, No Muss Baguettes From: Summer of 4 Ft. 2 (The Simpsons Season 7 – Episode 25)

  1. I wouldn’t shame you for eating an entire baguette in one evening. They are delicious.
    And I like how you used Homer’s “Le Grille” bit from the barbeque pit for “Nationale”. It made me laugh.

    1. It wouldn’t be difficult either. Once you get halfway through the baguette you’re thinking “I’ve come this far, why not go a little further?” until it’s too late.

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