Bart: Oh, damn FDA! Why can’t it all be marshmallow?
– Homer Badman (The Simpsons Season 6 – Episode 9)
Despite what some people might think (based on my writing and choice of foods), I am not a 10-year-old boy. Which is probably why I don’t want to eat a cereal that is entirely marshmallows, per Bart’s suggestion. Even when I actually was 10 years old, I recall not minding the little cardboard, somewhat “healthy” oat pieces that came in Lucky Charms cereal. Still, there are various places on the internet where you can buy bags of cereal marshmallows, so of course I had to buy some and try it myself.
I had built this cereal up in my mind as being something wonderful, but I have to say I was somewhat disappointed. First, these don’t taste like the marshmallows from Lucky Charms at all. They didn’t have the same “crunch” as the Lucky Charms marshmallows and were, in fact, very chewy. Also, sorry to say but eating a bowl of marshmallows in milk is probably not the best breakfast you can have in the morning. These actually kind of gave me a stomach ache and had me craving a bowl of REAL Lucky Charms…which I promptly went out and purchased. I then tried the cereal with lots of extra marshmallows added on, but was again disappointed.
In the end, I guess I’m a purist when it comes to cereal and just wanted to eat this the way the manufacture intended. Am I so out of touch with breakfast that? …No, it’s the marshmallow who are wrong.
Cromulence: 6 Big Ropy Muscles out of 10
No Fuss, No Muss: All Marshmallows From: Homer Badman (The Simpsons Season 6 – Episode 9)