Marge’s Pork Chops

Marge: A dash of rosemary, a smidgen of thyme, a pinch of marjoram…
Homer: You know, Marge, you make the best pork chops in the whole world.
Marge: Oh, Homer, they’re nothing special. The extra ingredient is care. A sprinkle of chervil, a teaspoon of turmeric, and a whisper of MSG.
– Itchy & Scratchy & Marge (The Simpsons Season 2 – Episode 9)

Marge’s Pork Chops Screenshot 2
Pork Chops (and Homer’s love of them) has been a long standing theme on The Simpsons. The first few seasons relied heavily on Homer eating or discussing pork chops in varying situations. Please note: I KNOW I’m not going to cover every single time pork chops are mentioned. This is meant as a discussion, not a comprehensive list.

The Importance of Apple Sauce:

Oh Brother, Where Art Thou? (S2E15) – “Cook? Sorry to bother you, but I got a hankering for…that’s right! With applesauce.”
Call of the Simpsons (S01E07) – “Could I have some applesauce?”

Call of the Simpsons Pork Chop Screenshot

Pork Chop Night and Guest Etiquette:

One Fish, Two Fish, Blowfish, Blue Fish (S2E11) – “Friday? Pork chop night?”
A Star Is Burns (S6E18) – “Homer, the guest should get the last pork chop.”

Guest Should Get the Last Pork Chop Screenshot

However, this “pork chop trend” started to trail off as Homer’s new food of choice transitioned to donuts. I think one of the reasons that pork chops became less popular on the show is that they are something of an outdated food item. So references to pork chops were out and donuts were in. Is this a massive conspiracy related to the the Rand Corporation, in conjunction with the saucer people, under the supervision of the reverse vampires in attempt to eliminate the meal of dinner? Probably. Anyway, for some reason Season 15 of the Simpsons got back into pork chops, maybe the writers were feeling nostalgic?

Treehouse of Horror XIV (S15E01) – “Thanks for not killing me, Homie. Here’s an extra pork chop.”

Thanks for not killing me, Homie. Here's an extra pork chop Screenshot

‘Tis the Fifteenth Season (S15E07) – “And tears are the sweetest sauce.”

Tears are the Sweetest Ingredient Screenshot

The Falcon and the D’ohman (S23E01) – “Would you like a get well pork chop?”

Get Well Pork Chop Screenshot

Anyway, let’s get to what you all came here to see, hardcore nudity! Oh wait, I mean let’s get to the classic recipe as prepared by Marge herself. Based on comments I’d read from other people who had made this recipe, I  noticed that bland was often used to describe these pork chops. Therefore, I decided to maximize the spices and used the ratios as Marge described them PER chop.

Ingredients:

  • 2 Pork Chops
  • Dash of rosemary
  • Smidgen of thyme
  • A pinch of marjoram
  • Sprinkle of chervil
  • Half a teaspoon of turmeric
  • A whisper of MSG
  • Care
  • Apple Sauce

Marge’s Pork Chops Ingredients

Directions:

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Mix spices in a bowl and set aside. Dry pork chops with a paper towel to ensure they will hold the spices and sprinkle on each side. Bake chops depending on meat thickness. My chops were quite thin, so I only baked them for 12 minutes.

Marge’s Pork Chops

Yeah, it doesn’t look very good and it didn’t taste very good either. Let me be clear, it didn’t taste bad either, it’s just that it’s hard to make good pork chops because I NEVER use care in any of my cooking. One thing I did discover is that apple sauce goes really well with pork chops. It certainly makes them taste less dry. Take that saucer people!

Cromulence: 5 Dumb Squirrels out of 10

Marge’s Pork Chops Recipe From: Itchy & Scratchy & Marge (The Simpsons Season 2 – Episode 9)

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