Ron Howard: Do I smell vodka…and wheatgrass?
Homer: It’s called a lawnmower, I invented it. Do you want one?
Ron Howard: Yeah, okay.
Kim Basinger: And I’ll have a rum and zinc.
Ron Howard: Ooh, I’ll have one of those, too. Hey, can I crash here tonight?
Homer: Sure, we’ll all stay!
– When You Dish Upon a Star (The Simpsons Season 10 – Episode 5)
So first of all, I didn’t make the Rum and Zinc. Here are my reasons:
- I’m thankful that I live in live in a world of telephones, car batteries, handguns, and many things made of zinc. No way am I depleting the precious zinc supply by trying to dissolve it in some rum
- I suspect that rum and zinc will taste exactly the same as regular rum, with a slight pill-like after taste
- I don’t feel like spending money to buy a bottle of zinc pills and then only use a single one. If anyone wants to send me some unsolicited drugs in the mail though…
The lawnmower is a much better drink anyway and it’s endorsed by Ron Howard so you know it’s good! Having never tried wheatgrass juice before, I was expecting it to taste pretty gross based on Lisa’s reaction to it in “Make Room For Lisa” and knowing what I do now, that response is justified.
Chop a few handfuls of wheatgrass and put in blender. Pour equal parts water and vodka (I used two shots each) into blender. Mix until well blended and serve immediately.
The so-called health benefits of wheatgrass juice are hotly debated on the internet; with science saying “meh, it’s not really hurting you as long as you don’t drink a gallon a day”, while certain other folks claim it can basically prevent every disease and condition that exists. Not being a scientician myself, I can’t comment on the health benefits. What I can tell you is that the lawnmower tasted pretty bad. It was kind of like some horrible “medicine” given to you by a crooked shaman, and then you trip out for the next 18 hours and lose your pants.
Thankfully, I did not go on a spiritual journey or lose my pants (don’t you hate pants?) after drinking this. I mostly just had a bit of a tummy ache. Also, the wheatgrass stalks got all tangled in my blender and I had to spend ten minutes taking it apart. So while the drink recreation was a success, I wouldn’t make this again. Maybe I should try the Rum and Zinc after all…any takers on shipping me some zinc?
Cromulence: 2 Talking pies out of 10
Homer’s Lawnmower & Rum and Zinc Recipe From: When You Dish Upon a Star (The Simpsons Season 10 – Episode 5)
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