Chester J. Lampwick`s Liver and Onions

Chester J. Lampwick: Want to go celebrate? I feel like liver and onions.
– The Day the Violence Died (The Simpsons Season 7 – Episode 18)


I pride myself on trying everything once. I enjoy eating things like tripe and chicken feet. I love pâté so I should also love liver and onions…but no I couldn’t do it. Right from the start of making this I knew I couldn’t do it. From the smell of the liver fresh out of the packaging to the smell as it was cooking I knew this was going to be a disaster. Anyway, I still made it so here we go!


  • Liver
  • Onions
  • Flour
  • Beef broth
  • Salt and pepper

Chester-J.-Lampwick`s-Liver-and-Onions Ingredients


Place flour, salt, and pepper in a bowl and set aside. Slice the onion into thin stripes. Next, slice the liver into smaller pieces and dredge the liver with the flour. Heat a large skillet with oil to medium-high heat. Cook the onions until translucent. Add the liver on top of the onions and add beef broth to simmer. Cover and simmer for several minutes and serve.


As far as foods you eat when celebrating this is going to rank very low on my list. That metallic taste that you only get from something like liver, not good. Of course, I would be remiss if I didn’t mention that this is a food enjoyed by the Flanders family:

Rod: Oh boy, liver!
Todd: Iron helps us play.
– Lisa’s First Word (The Simpsons Season 4 – Episode 10)


I’m sure iron does help you play Todd, but first you have to physically chew and swallow liver. I’d rather be all tired and hungry while playing then ever prepare, cook, and eat liver and onions again.

Cromulence: 1 Rich Uncle Skeletons out of 10

Chester J. Lampwick`s Liver and Onions Recipe From: The Day the Violence Died (The Simpsons Season 7 – Episode 18)

    1. Not the way I make it! I actually really like pate because it’s got a bunch of added spices / flavors. Liver and onions is intended to taste like liver…and liver tastes extremely bitter and, not sure how to describe it, but bloody? I understand other people like it, but it’s not sometime I plan on making again.

  1. Hello Joe.
    Anyways I wondered when you’d get around to doin this one. Not that I blame you for holding off on it. I suppose you couldn’t con El Boyfriendo into doin this one for you either.
    Though I suppose there are people who like liver. I mean its just liver its not gonna kill you. Though if Rod and Todd like it so much would that make them ghouls?
    But I have one question. Is there liver in chopped chicken liver because that’s what’s in a Louie Anderson at the Showbiz Deli.

    1. The liver I prepared was all beef and I diced it up before preparing, rather than eating a huge 8-inch slab of organ meat – this is also the traditional method for preparation. Also, quite frankly if Rod and Todd like something it’s probably terrible and best to be avoided.

  2. My dad’s parents used to LOVE this “meal.” Nana could cook like every stereotypical grandmother, but, holy God, was this ever awful. It was the only thing that could out-stink the smell of cigarettes in that house.

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