A White Wine Spritzer…Spritzer…Spritzer

Amber: More libations, my imperial conqueror?
Homer: Huh?
Ginger: More booze!
Homer: Oh, yeah. Two more of these, please. And for you, Ned?
Ned: I’ll have a Shirley… no, a Virgin…no! Make it a children’s…Oh, what the heck, you only live once. Give me a white wine spritzer…spritzer…spritzer…
– Viva Ned Flanders (The Simpsons Season 10 – Episode 10)


White wine spritzers are considered a summer cocktail; the combination of the soda and chilled wine make it good for sipping outdoors. I suppose it could also be considered a “girly” drink, which is probably why Ned is ordering one. Although, based on the cup, straws and little umbrella in Homer’s drink, I’m thinking his drink is pretty “girly” as well.


But, no matter how girly a drink is, if you have too much alcohol in your system you will end up with a pounding headache and a mouth that tastes like vomit.


  • White Wine
  • Club Soda


Mix a ratio of 2:1 chilled white wine to club soda. Don’t marry any cocktail waitresses.


This is probably the easiest drink I’ve ever made outside of that gasoline I had that one time, MOTHER! While I do enjoy white wine, I don’t really care for club soda. Quite frankly I don’t understand the point of this drink. If you want fizzy wine then just buy sparkling wine and then you aren’t diluting your precious, precious alcohol.

Cromulence: 3 Full Waffle Bar Privileges out of 10

A White Wine Spritzer…Spritzer…Spritzer Recipe From: Viva Ned Flanders (The Simpsons Season 10 – Episode 10)

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